


Caught Up In a Memory

by Artisty_Dreamer



Series: Caught Up In Flames (One-Shot Series) [4]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-18 02:26:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5894515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Artisty_Dreamer/pseuds/Artisty_Dreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma needed to find out who Regina was. The blonde needed to know exactly what she was capable of in her past. Henry’s storybook had captured the key events in her life, but it didn’t tell her entire life and all the horrors she had done as the Evil Queen.</p><p>- Fourth part of the "Caught Up In Flames" series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Caught Up In a Memory

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, everyone!  
> I know it's been quite a while since I've updated the series. And I am ashamed and truly sorry for that.  
> However, I do hope this makes up for it :)  
> Enjoy!
> 
> \- AD
> 
> P.S. Feedback always appreciated.

Of course the entire town was happy and enjoying themselves. Once again someone had saved them and they could go on about their lives. It was almost sad that they always needed a hero to save their buts. And when their buts were saved by a former villain they didn’t even bother to say thank you.

They were a lot nicer to Regina though. They were actually trusting her. The biggest surprise to her was Grumpy. When Marian decided to have a little chat and actually cause a scene in front of Henry, it was Grumpy who decided to defend the former Evil Queen and put an end to Marian’s accusations. Later he told Regina that he knew what it’s like to lose someone you love and that, if he had a kid, he would never stand it, if someone caused a scene like that in front of him.

The worst part were the looks of compassion that turned into smiles the minute Regina addressed someone. Everyone saw her effort to change. Truth was in the fact that, not completely everyone in town thought Regina deserved redemption. Some of them still hated her for everything she had done. But those were quickly overpowered by the Charmings. This didn’t feel at all natural. People whose happiness she had been trying so hard to destroy were now protecting her and even caring for her.

Despite this, most of the time the former Evil Queen still found herself completely alone. Henry spent most of his time with her, but lately the teenager could be found at Emma’s more and more often than Regina would like. Emma… Even though they had discovered a civil way to interact with each other, both women still preferred to avoid the other. Besides Emma had Hook. From what Regina had heard from Snow’s ramblings, she could tell Emma was happy. At least someone was.

There was this unexplainable rush of jealousy every time Regina saw the pair walking down the street. There were moments when she wanted to rip the pirate’s throat apart with his own hook. The former Evil Queen could practically see that image in front of her. She could almost feel his blood on her hands.

As for Marian, Regina could lock her up. Even if Snow White has taken her place as the Mayor, there were still enough places in Storybrooke the Charming clan had no idea about. But Marian’s disappearance was bound to lead to her. What if she cast a memory spell? No one would even know the peasant was here in the first place. Not even Regina herself, if she played her cards right. That peasant was the only thing standing in the way of her happiness.

Maybe she still was the Evil Queen. That is the role she has been given in this story after all, wasn’t it? Villains don’t get happy endings, so perhaps it was time for her to fully commit to her role. After all, there was nothing left for her. So why not have some fun?

 _“You see, this is how it is. You think you are the diner at the feast, tasting the offerings. A little love, a little darkness. What you don't realize is _ **you**__ _are the feast. And the darkness has tasted you! The darkness likes how you taste. It doesn't mind the bitter. And now it's started the meal, it's going to finish it. You can no more fly from your fate than can that swan.”_

She remembered the Dark One’s words as if he had said them just moments ago. He made her like this. Rumpelstiltskin knew what would become of her after she’d complete her training. He knew everything that was bound to happen. So now that she’s been given this role, maybe she should just embrace it? One final bow to the fate as the Evil Queen.

“Mom?” she heard Henry’s voice in the doorway.

 _Henry._ The boy’s concerned voice snapped her out of the darkness. Back to light. The same way it did when she held the boy in her arms for the first time. Her Little Prince.

“Is everything okay?” he asked approaching her.

“Yes, Henry. Why are you asking?”

“You were tearing through the book with your scary face on.”

“I’m fine,” she reassured him and closed the storybook. “I just…”

“Is this about Robin Hood?” the boy questioned with concern.

“I…don’t know,” Regina answered, surprised at herself.

Was this about Robin? It was about her losing her happy ending. Again. But was it still just about losing Robin? Lately it didn’t feel like it. Regina had to admit that lately she couldn’t even find herself caring for him the way she used to. It still hurt, but somehow she found herself not caring as much as she expected herself to.

“I hate to see you both like this,” Henry said, shaking his head.

“ _Both_?” Regina questioned his choice of words.

“You and mom,” he explained. “You are both miserable. I just want you guys to be happy.”

Emma was miserable? She did have the pirate. Why would she be miserable? It was better if she stayed away from Regina. There was no point in breaking both their lives like this.

“Just go and talk to her,” the boy continued. “Please? She feels too guilty to come to talk to you.”

 

*****

 

Emma needed to find out who Regina was. The blonde needed to know exactly what she was capable of in her past. Henry’s storybook had captured the key events in her life, but it didn’t tell her entire life and all the horrors she had done as the Evil Queen.

Emma needed to know this, if they were ever to put their past behind them and maybe start a future. Emma needed to know, Emma needed to understand.

_“But what if she won’t?” Regina thought._

What if it the truth will make Emma resent her? Hate her? Regina blinked away the tears she didn’t realize were slowly filling her eyes and found herself on the driveway of the Sherriff’s new house. She got the address from Henry when he told her about Emma moving out of her parents’ apartment. At that point Regina had no intention of ever visiting. But now… She just wanted to look inside those green eyes. Even if it was for the last time.

“Regina?” Emma asked in a voice instantly filled with worry when she saw the brunette on her porch drenched to the bone and shivering from the cold air.

“Hi.”

“You’re shivering,” the blonde said.

Emma had to restrain herself from hugging the woman in front of her, who in that moment looked like she was about to break, if someone caressed her.

To feel Regina’s breath against her skin, to feel her hand roam all over her body – in that moment Emma was willing to do anything for that.

“Emma…” the former Evil Queen whispered with tears in her eyes.

“What are you doing here?”

“I had to see you,” Regina tried to explain. “We need to talk.”

“Okay, Regina, we need to warm you up,” Emma spoke in a calm voice, taking brunette by her arm.

“I’m fine,” the other woman tried to dismiss Emma’s hand.

The gesture wasn’t rude and didn’t come from anger. Which was sending mixed signals towards Emma. What should she do?

_“Don’t just stand there! Help her,” the little voice in Emma’s head exclaimed in frustration. “Then you can listen to what she has to say.”_

“No, you are not,” the blonde said sternly. “Come with me. When you stop shivering, then we can talk.”

Regina entered the house. She had never been here before, so she took her time in noticing the details. Carefully, not to let Emma know she was doing it. They entered the living room. Thankfully the fireplace was already glowing with yellow flames.

The first thing Regina noticed were the pictures on the mantle. Pictures of the Charmings, her newborn baby brother and of course Henry. A few of them Regina had seen in Snow White’s apartment. Her eyes ran over all of them, but then she stopped at a picture she didn’t even know existed. It was a picture of her. Regina had no idea Emma had secretly taken it.

They both made themselves comfortable on the couch in front of the fireplace. And after a few glasses of whiskey and change of clothing that Emma had given her, Regina was able to feel her hands again.

“So,” Emma said after Regina had relatively warmed up, “what are you doing here? I thought we were avoiding each other when we weren’t discussing something regarding our son. Something tells me you are not here for that.”

“No, I’m not,” Regina shook her head.

“Then what?”

“Henry told me about…” Regina was trying to find the right words. “He told me about how you have been lately and I…”

“Wanted to see for yourself?”

“Emma…”

“I’m not okay! Is that what you want to hear? That I’m falling apart? Well fuck you! I’m doing fine!”

“Emma, please!” Regina raised her voice. “I came here because I wanted to explain why I said what I said that morning in the diner.”

“Go on.”

“I said that because I was scared,” the brunette continued. “You don’t know who I am. If you knew what I was really like, you wouldn’t want anything to do with me.”

“After everything we have been through you think I would do that?”

“I have killed and tortured hundreds, no thousands of innocent people,” Regina spoke with tears in her voice.

“I know,” Emma nodded.

“Then how can you still want anything to do with me?”

“Exposing your dark side doesn’t frighten me; hiding it does,” Emma answered.

“You don’t have the slightest idea of the things I have done,” Regina said in a low tone.

And then it dawned on Emma. Regina wasn’t here to be with her. She was here to get rid of Emma. She was here to make sure Emma would never want to do anything with the former Evil Queen.

“You came to my house to scare me off?” Emma asked in disbelief.

Regina was silent. But that was all the confirmation Emma needed.

“Scare me then!”

“Emma, that’s not what I’m trying...”

“Tell me the worst that you have ever done.”

There was silence in the room.

“Tell me!” Emma demanded. “I want to know!”

“Emma…please, I…” Regina hesitated.

“You are not that person anymore,” the blonde reassured the other woman. “I won’t think any less of you. There’s just no way that I could.”

“Alright,” Regina said, gathering her courage or at least what was left of it.

Remembering her life as the Evil Queen was the last thing she wanted to do. Even if the purpose of her coming here this evening was to do exactly that, she had not thought it would be so hard to do once Regina did get to it. But she couldn’t say no to the blonde woman and those piercing green eyes in front of her.

 

_Her heels clicked on the cold stone floor and the sound echoed through the almost empty dungeon. Only a few of her captives were granted the mercy of staying alive and peacefully live out the rest of their days in their cells. Some of them were of value to her – a nice leverage against those who could go against her. They would all die sooner or later anyway, they just didn’t know about it._

_She walked with her head held high while her dress swished around her because of the speed she had taken up. As she moved past the cells, her captives tried desperately to hide themselves in the shadows by the back walls of their “homes”. But today she cared very little for them. The intention of her visit was completely different._

_Guards let the Evil Queen in the cell to look at poor excuse of a man who had tried to steal her mirror. He wasn’t even stealing it for its power. He just wanted to sell it._

_“Close the cell and leave us,” Regina’s voice was as cold as ice._

_She waited till she couldn’t hear the steps anymore. The poor excuse for a man just laid there still on the floor. It seemed that even his chest didn’t move to take a breath. As if he was pretending to be dead. That irritated and irked her on even more. How can he threat a Queen like that? Who does he think he is?_

_"You must be quite foolish to steal from your Queen," she said in amusement._

_“I’m sorry, Your Majesty,” the man pleaded, finally moving into a standing position. “Please…”_

_“Now you’re begging for forgiveness?” she asked in disgust. “How pathetic. Get some backbone, little rat. You should be taught a lesson.”_

_It only took a gentle wave of the Queen’s hand. The man was now made from the mirror glass, looking afraid of Regina’s next step. Now he was too vulnerable to survive. He realized this was the end._

_"Oh my, what a pretty mirror you turned out to be," she told herself, scraping its surface with her nail._

_The glass shuttered with thousand little cracks. Blood started to pour in crimson flows from one of them, right where the Queen’s nail had caressed. Agonizing screams filled the cell, man trying to grasp at the last moments of his vanishing life. Soon there was blood coming from every single one of those cracks. The man felt so helpless and Evil Queen was ravishing in the pleasure from making this person suffer_ _._

_“Nobody steals something that I care for from me,” she stated every word with such confidence that no one could ever intimidate her._

_Then just snap of her fingers made room fill with last loud scream from the man and pieces of glass hitting the blood soaked floor._

_It was funny how she didn’t care. The Evil Queen had made the man pay for his crime and probably had thought a lesson for others. A few days later she won’t even remember what he looked like._

 

Regina finished her story and looked up from her glass, where her gaze had been focused all this time. The brunette was cautiously looking for Emma’s eyes. She wanted to see them, to maybe seek comfort in them, but she was afraid of what she might see in them. She didn’t want to be rejected. Not like this, not because of her past that Emma, out of all people, had so many times put behind them.

That was it. There were no more masks left. This was no longer the Evil Queen; it was not the Mayor in front of Emma. It was just Regina. That was it. Emma wasn’t the Sheriff or the Savior. It wasn’t about the titles anymore. It was just two people who have fallen in love. Two damaged people who were afraid to be rejected by the other.

“Emma, please,” Regina was the first to speak up. “Say something.”

Emma was silent for a moment, which seemed like forever to Regina. Then she took the glass from the brunette’s hands, put it on the small table in front of them and took Regina’s hands in hers, startling the other woman a bit.

“Do you know what as the first thing I remembered when I got my memories back in New York?”

“No,” Regina whispered, not trusting her voice.

“The first thing I remembered was you,” Emma continued, looking at their hands. “I remembered the first time I met you after Henry had dragged me to Storybrooke. I remembered how we fought and how you basically tried to kill me.”

“I didn’t want to kill you per say,” Regina interrupted, defending herself. “I just wanted to get rid of you.”

“I know,” Emma said with a smile. “But things changed in Neverland. We were both trying to save Henry and Pan’s game required us to admit who we really were, come to terms with our true selves. I saw a part of you I hadn’t seen before. I guess that’s when I started to fall in love with you. After I brought back Marian, I realized I never wanted to hurt you again. Even if it meant that I had to stay away from you. But then we spent the night together and I thought that I’ve finally found my happy ending. I cannot describe how it felt to be in your arms, to finally feel at home. I can sense that you care about me too, so please…”

Regina didn’t say anything. There were no words to describe how she felt at that moment. The only way was to show it. And that she did.

The moment their lips caressed Regina showed Emma everything she felt for her. And Emma understood it. Every cell of her body responded to Regina, as if by some design Regina was the only one who Emma responded to even subconsciously. She didn’t need words. There were no more questions.

Emma’s hands found their way to Regina’s hair, still slightly damp from the rain. Regina herself moved closer to the blonde and was now straddling Emma’s lap. It was as if they both knew each other’s body by heart. Every spot that made the other hum in pleasure, every caress they melted into.

“Take us to the bedroom,” Regina said quietly.

“Alright,” Emma whispered and they both went upstairs in silence.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Emma asked carefully as they entered the bedroom. “I need to know you won’t regret it.”

“Are _you_ sure?” instead of an answer came a question.

It only took three seconds for the world to start over. They stood there in the dark with crossed fingers and hoped for the best.

“I’m sure,” came the answer from both of them.


End file.
